A friend of mine works backstage for the Seattle Opera company and he told me about their great new production of Aida.
Now keep in mind.... I have never, EVER been to an opera. Sure, I've seen them on TV but I've never actually experienced one... Growing up, true "culture" for me was watching MTV... really sad.
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I decided to give it a try and I went by myself on a Sunday afternoon.
Have to say, it was great! Aida isn't known for having very memorable music or recognizable arias that you are likely to hum... as if. Most people go see Aida because the story is set in Egypt and the sets and costumes are grandiose. The show didn't disappoint.
Still, since this was my first time attending the opera, I couldn't help but make some strong and blunt observations....
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Observation #1 - At the end of every opera, everybody dies or has to live with the pain of someone's death.... What the fuck?...
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Observation #2 - The fat lady truly does sing... and there are lots of "portly" women in opera. Why is it that they always play the "young, vivacious" characters, but they look like they just chowed down at Hometown Buffet?
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Observation #3 - Opera Bears are hotties!.... just like this handsome little bear from Australia who performed the lead character, Radames.... grrr!
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Observation #4 - A lot of people who attend operas are smug... and they enjoy the smell of their own farts... I found this out first hand. Right at the most emotional part of Aida, someone in my section started "baking brownies"... I know everyone smelled it because I could see people shifting uncomfortably in their seats.... I blame the 80 year old guy sitting next to me...
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Observation #5 - Thank God for captions!!! Aida is sung in Italian and I can't imagine what it was like long ago to attend the opera and not have a clue what was going on. My spanish is pretty good, so I was able to pick out some words... but not enough to understand it all. Make note.... during an opera, pay attention to the words that display on the board above the stage. They are your lifeline in the world of opera.
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Observation #6 - At an opera, it is easy to feel like a "cat at a dog convention"... Even though the Seattle Opera web site said that there is no dress code for opera, people always dress up. I took my motorcycle to the opera, so I was dressed in a t-shirt, jeans, boots and my riding jacket... I got lots of stares.
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Observation #7 - Beware of coffee-clatches of little old ladies who attend the opera.... You know that they all meet beforehand at Denny's for breakfast, then head to the opera to terrorize innocent victims like me... During breaks they tear out of the theater and make way for the free coffee. By the time you get there, the table is a mess and their isn't a drop to be found anywhere... and they never leave a donation in the donation bucket... I'll be in therapy for years.
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Observation #8 - At an opera, be prepared to applaud multiple times... even when you're not sure what you are applauding for... I still have caluses.
Those are my observations so far....
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KILL DUH WABBIT!! KILL DUH WABBIT!! KILL DUH WABBIT!!
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